Stupid columnist Elliott

If I were ever to write a column for a major newspaper, say the Los Angeles Times, I would never choose a subject that I was not familiar with. Helene Elliott wrote an article on Kobe being an Olympic champ, and exposed herself as an ignorant non-Kobe-fan.

Here is her disgusting misquote from Kobe.

"He told me to let that mama loose," Bryant said, "and that's what I was able to do."

Are you kidding me? He is known to legions of people as the self-proclaimed Black Mamba (cheesy, I know). Everyone knows that. So one can only hope that Elliott accidentally mistyped the "b" in Mamba because Kobe is for sure not a drag queen. He does not have a mama in his soul. Even if he does, he's a frickin Galactical Superstar, he wouldn't admit that. It would hurt his machismo.

And right now my brother is suffering from deluded-teenager-thinks-he's-a-rebel syndrome. He needs to get over himself, because he is being so annoying. I really hate his attitude. He needs a fixup.