i guess...idc

I’m moving in on Sunday, and I am very annoyed right now. I feel very underappreciated by everybody and I feel alone. I’ve been keeping busy lately—doing doodling artwork and projects. I am tired and I am anxious. Even though this is my only week of real vacation, I don’t want to rest—I feel like I’m wasting time if I do. I am too much of a workaholic.
Anyways so I’m anxious—but on top of that, I don’t feel like I have anyone to talk to. Worst is that I am not seeking out anyone to talk to; as I’ve said—I’m annoyed, irritated, cynical… My mom wants to go to Vegas, but I’m moving in on Sunday, and she handles the situation like I should change the date to accommodate her. I feel like my parents don’t feel the need to care for my brother and me anymore. I mean, I know my parents love me, but I don’t feel like I’m a priority in their lives anymore. That sucks, but I guess I know how they’re feeling—they’re old and should be playing. They are way too social now. It’s their friends’ influence. Just because their friends are old and their friends’ children are grown up, and are thus able to freely enjoy life as retirees, they feel entitled to doing so—but they chose to have kids when their same friends decided to just settle. So the result is, they neglect us many times. However, I guess they do feel guilty, and so if I were a brat, I could exploit them. But I have ethics.
Overall, I just feel underappreciated. And as a result as of now, I’m not going to try so hard anymore. I know who values and does not value me. Perhaps it is stress, or not. But I really don’t feel like trying—I’m too tired, really over it; and if no one wants to put me first, I will.